THE CONFIDENT TEENAGER

One of the most important areas teachers should strive to learn more about is how to teach children to be confident. It is very important for a child to be confident, bold and courageous. A child who has all this qualities will be able to say no when he ought to and even stand for what is right without the supervision of his/her parents/teachers. A confident child is self-dependent, strong and determined.

It is true that creating a loving, stable environment will make it easier to enhance a child's confidence. However, a loving, stable environment is only part of the process of how to teach children to be confident. In order for kids to become confidence, they must also be taught people skills and you need to develop their character to create true confidence. 

True confidence means being comfortable in any setting by having people skills and feeling strong enough to resist temptations by having a strong character. A child must be able to relate with people without feeling inferior or incapable of expressing thoughts.

It is important that we start to teach children certain skills to boost their confidence at a tender age.

They must be able to start conversations, meet and greet people without being told, they must say the magic words and be able to ask questions irrespective of the number of people present. These things may seem very trivial, but the truth of the matter is if these children are not trained to do these things, they may never see the need to do them and as they grow they believe it’s okay to stay quiet, it’s okay not to ask questions, it’s okay not to say thank you, and they begin to hide in their shells, they hold back their thoughts and become withdrawn. But once a child grows up knowing these basic things, he will never depart from it and it will help him/her to interact freely.

Once you begin to develop children to know the things that matter, you are not only building his/her confidence, you are grooming a leader. Such a child grows up in confidence, he is able to speak up and even speak on behalf of others.

Along with the people skills, they must also be taught important character development traits. How to handle pressure, sticking to the truth always and respecting people who are older. A lot of parents think that their child is too quiet, he/she doesn’t talk, he doesn’t know how to relate etc. all these things are minor things and the child just needs a push to build his confidence.

Once we can build the people skills and character of a child with the help of parents, confidence is definitely assured.

Ink from a borrowed pen?

Growing up, I was made to sing Whitney Houston’s song – Greatest Love over and over. Every time there was a special event or presentation we would come out in numbers singing the words of the song as the audience would clap and cheer. The thing is I never really understood the depth of the lyrics as a child.

I’ve decide long ago never to walk in anyone’s shadow,

If I fail, if I succeed, at least I’ll live as I believe,

No matter what they take from me,

They can’t take away my dignity …

In these lyrics of courage, there is something of depth that says that I will live what I believe and I will shine regardless of interference.    

There is a purpose for which I was created and that is to show forth the glory of God.

Using an ink from a borrowed pen, would only defeat the purpose for which I was created.

Shining through the eyes of another other than God would only reduce the power in my creation.

Walking in the victories of others, would only mean that the power of creation is too small to work the same victories through me.

I look at the title of this piece as I write and thoughts flip through my mind. I cannot constantly live my life on someone else’s ink; I cannot hide through another’s light and shine through a borrowed mirror. I need my own pen and my mirror.

The reality of it all is that we have the permission of God to hold up our own pen and mirror,

We have the permission of God to shine as lights,

We have the permission of God to be who He has called us to be,

We have the permission of God to be the best,

We have the permission of God to achieve the best but somehow we find ourselves seeking out the permission of the world in our daily living.

You may ask how am I using an ink from a borrowed pen:

When you can’t take major decisions on your own and you rely on answers from the society and trends,

When people’s opinion is the fuel on which your life runs,

When you constantly refuse every opportunity to shine,

When you walk in someone else’s shadow and being,

When you allow people take advantage of you,

When your life is a constant struggle to be like someone else,

What this means is that you are giving people the permission to prevent the light God has given you from shining through and through, leaving you dry and unattractive.

God has given you a pen and an ink: God has given you a body and His Spirit, which makes God’s Glory abound to you. God’s glory is His beauty, His splendour, His very being, the light of His presence and that is what you have been created for. (Isaiah 43:7)

Stop using someone else’s ink to create a remix of Gods purpose for your life, use your God given pen and ink. God’s glory can be seen in your music, fashion, relationship, family and everything in between. You just need to decide whose voice has the microphone in your life, the voice of God or the people’s voice.

Looking around, life keeps moving, seems like there’s a template of how everything should be, there’s a template for fashion, a template for music, a template for opinions, a template for relationships, a template for life itself but as I pen this down, I am reminded of the lyrics of Casting Crowns in WHAT IF HIS PEOPLE PRAYED.

What if the armies of the Lord
Picked up and dusted off their swords
Vowed to set the captives free
And not let Satan have one more

What if the church, for heaven's sake
Finally stepped up to the plate
Took a stand upon God's promise
And stormed hell's rusty gates

What if His people prayed
And those who bear His name
Would humbly seek His face, yeah
And turn from their own way

And what would happen if we prayed
For those raised up to lead the way
Then maybe kids in school could pray
And unborn children see the light of day

What if the life that we pursue
Came from a hunger for the truth
What if the family turned to Jesus
Stopped asking Oprah what to do

So then I resolve to pray,

 I resolve never to hide behind another’s success,

I resolve never to walk in the shadow of another,

I resolve to be Gods glory,

I resolve to be what I believe,

I resolve to silence every voice contrary to God’s voice,

I resolve to use my God given pen and ink to write my name and purpose in the sand of time, so help me God.

LET YOUR LIGHT SO SHINE BEFORE MENT THAT THEY MAY SEE YOUR GOOD WORKS AND GLORIFY YOUR FATHER IN HEAVEN.

SHINE PEOPLE; LET’S SHINE.

YES I CAN

Yes I can change

Yes I can smile.

Yes I can do anything.

Yes I can try.

Yes I can walk through the storm.

Yes I can step out of the ordinary.

Yes I can do everything I set my mind on.

Yes I can dance in the rain.

Yes I can be happy.

Yes I can praise in the storm.

Yes I can live a life of obedience.

Yes I can live above sin.

Yes I can hold on.

Yes I can make it.

Yes I can make it through my trials.

Yes I can lend my voice.

Yes I can make a difference.

Yes I can be netter

Yes I can turn my dreams into a plan

Yes I can turn my plans into my reality

Yes I can stop believing the excuses.

Yes I can do hard things.

Yes I can see the miracle that I am.

Yes I can say no to the bad and yes to the best.

Yes I can stand out.

Yes I can be on top.

Yes I can give my best.

Yes I can stay strong.

Yes I can change the world.

Yes I can prove my point.

Because I can and I will do it through Christ who gives me strength.

I WRITE ABOUT A MAN

I write about a man, a fine man.

I write about his heart,

I write about how he is totally sold out to God in thoughts and actions.

I write about his strength,

I write about how protected I feel when his arms are circled around me.

I write about his voice, voice so melting,

I write about how tender and soothing his words run through my veins.

I write about his touch,

I write about how soft and smooth it flows.

I write about his respect,

I write about how he honours and regards a woman.

I write about his faithfulness,

I write about how he stays true to one woman.

I write about his truth,

I write about how the thoughts in his heart, the look on his face and the words of his mouth all dance to the same rhythm.

I write about his power,

I write about how beautifully he shares in my worries like it were joy.

I write about his smile,

I write about how perfectly the curves are created around his mouth even in trying times.

I write about his security,

I write about how he is not destructively jealous neither is he rude.

I write about his patience,

I write about how he waits, how he just sits and wait.

I write about his heart,

I write about his forgiveness and how easily he puts the past behind.

I write about his quietness,

I write about how in his mind he rains prayers for his beloved.

I write about words unspoken,

I write about how even in silence actions reveal silence.

I write about his face,

I write about the beauty that radiates from being together.

I write about his profession,

I write about how hard-working and committed he is.

I write about his determination,

I write about how he doesn't stop until its done.

I write about his character,

I write about how endearing and charming he is.

I write about his imperfection,

I write about how quickly imperfectly perfect the man is.

I write about his mistakes,

I write about how quickly he learns and moves on.

I write about the mixed feelings,

I write about how quickly thoughts and actions are on the good time.

I write about his love,

I write about how contagious, how magical, how passionate, how real it is.

I write about his God,

I write about how he has been blessed and how his relationship has even made him a better man.

I write about a man, whose heart is sold to loving,

When you see the man I write about, please tell him that I know my love gives him strength but he should know that loving a man like him gives me courage.

THE 'IN VOGUE' GIRL

I refuse to be the ‘in vogue’ girl,

I refuse to live constantly in sin,

I refuse to take nudity as the new fashion style,

I refuse to cheat on love,

I refuse to be another man’s secret,

I refuse to be the reason behind another’s sorrows,

I refuse to be disrespected,

I refuse to judge the pride and dignity of womanhood on the shallow table of physical beauty.

I refuse to be neutral.

I choose to take a side,

I choose to stand for what is right even if I stand alone,

I choose to stand and be a support in time of adversity

I refuse to chop, clean mouth and carry go,

I plan to work hard and long in the way of my goals.

I refuse to be the voice that shuts others down,

I refuse to bully and harass others,

I refuse to see anyone as ordinary because no one truly is.

God sits in the temple of human body so I choose to stand and see God in every one.

I refuse to be a pain and reproach to those who love me.

I refuse to give my children and husband anything short of the best.

I refuse to stand down,

I choose to stand for what I believe even if that makes me unpopular.

I refuse to live a fake life,

I refuse to grace the bed of men for favours,

I refuse to fight against myself,

I refuse to allow inordinate affections becloud my judgement,

I refuse to give anyone permission to abuse me.

I am a voice

I am a people

I am a nation

I am a brand

I am Gods ambassador

I refuse to be anything less

I refuse to be the in vogue girl who just goes with the flow, who is willing to bend standards for the pleasure of the moment.

I refuse to be the in vogue girl who is not willing to make sacrifices to reach her goals, who is not capable of loving truthfully.

I refuse to be the in vogue girl whose standards are determined by what society says and what the world accepts.

I refuse to be the in vogue kind of girl because I am a daddy’s girl and daddy’s girls have standards, when they fall short of daddy’s standards, they run back into the loving arms of daddy.

Do they give up? NO

Do they stand down? NO

Daddy simply gives strength to carry on and try again to live by the standards. So yes I would rather be a daddy’s girl than be judged by the ever changing rules of the world.

Signed:

Daddy’s Girl.

HOW DARE YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE ALONE?

'When you go through deep waters, I will be with you.'  Isa 43:2

As I read through this bible promise, I imagined one in the deep waters, drowning but still struggling to come out of the deep, hands looking for one to hold his hands out, with no help in sight, he battles for another chance at life. With his last breathe he begins to fight, hoping that he would come out of the deep waters. At that point, there’s a fight, there’s a determination to live, a determination to survive, a determination never to give up.

Then I searched through the dictionary. The dictionary defines deep as extending far below the surface; far to the bottom: low in situation: lying far below the general surface; hard to comprehend.

This implies that deep could be really extreme. I hear people say ‘you are in deep soup.’ It means that such a person is so deep, so gone, so down into that trouble that there might be no way of escape.

 I look around and I see a lot of deep waters. People trying to stay on top; people trying to ride safely on the water; people struggling and trying to find a way of escape. Sometimes it’s so messy and you cannot just understand it. When we get to those points where we can’t comprehend, when we get to the points of struggle, when we get to the point where all effort to ride safely proves abortive, that friends is DEEP.

We must have been through certain deep waters in our lives, we might even be going through them right now but what are you doing in the deep waters. The work of life is something we must not give up on; we mustn't get to the deep and admit that it is over because the deep waters won’t last forever.

As I look through this promise I realise that there will be times when we will pass through the DEEP but there’s a promise of a guard, there’s a promise that we are never alone, there’s a promise that we will not drown, there’s a promise that we will come out stronger, there’s a promise that for as long as we are in the deep we are never alone.

Are you below the surface? Are you far at the bottom? Are you low in situation? Are you lying far below general surface? Then you are in a deep but you are not alone.

As we walk through the deep waters of life, we must constantly remember the promise of a life guard, that promise, that hope, that assurance, that truth must keep us going. It is capable of sustaining and relieving every drowning person. 

Think about it, you didn't just fall on the surface of the earth, you didn't just appear by an act of magic, you came into the world as something beautiful, a masterpiece, a rare gem, a miracle and a treasure. How dare you think that you are alone?

It is only a deep water, stretch out your hands and the one who knew how you came to be made a promise of companionship. If you think He would fail on that promise you need to have a rethink.

Nobody Greater than you - Josh Sax